Lesley fidgeted with the loose end of his belt as he walked, trying to dismiss the prickle between his shoulderblades as irrational. He had had a rougher day than he'd expected - well, longer, at any rate. Why a man whose previous career included semi-regularly being bludgeoned half to death should find going to haggle at the market for dates and spices and delivering a few custom purchases rough, he wasn't entirely sure. Some days he could accept that he had a short attention span, a short temper, and a seemingly limitless capacity to find similarities between random people and the friends he'd lost over the last decade and more. Some days it made him feel weak, broken, that he'd won, he'd gotten what every gladiator wanted, and he couldn't actually appreciate it and get on with his life. Some days, like today, he was just fed up with the world and felt that, somehow, all these stupid soft people around him deserved to go a round in the arena, or right here on the street, deserved to have their blood spilled and their bones broken so that they would just shut up and leave him the hell alone.
He knew it was irrational. Knew that the eyes he felt on the back of his neck, the whispers, were as much an illusion as the times he swore he heard his name called from the crowd in the voice of a dead man. Mostly.
He should just go home. He wasn't fit company for anyone, he was done his errands, he should go back to the shop that still didn't yet feel entirely familiar, hide in the back room or the courtyard from everyone, safe behind his mother's skirts and her worried eyes... he walked into the nearest wine shop and put a coin down on the counter.
The gladiator - former gladiator - took the wineskin he received in return, and scanned the room, looking for a quiet corner but at the same time instinctively sizing everyone up and classifying each as a potential threat or not, judging more on mood and level of inebriation than size or build. Hard to tell at a glance who might be the scrappy, squirmy sort of person he hated fighting bare-handed, and he was used to an environment where nobody was entirely harmless. He took a swig of the wine, and reflected that he really should just take his drink and head out. The air inside the tavern was filled with too many voices, and being surrounded by cheerfully drunk people was not going to improve his mood. On the other hand, he didn't really want to go back, either... He scowled and scanned the room again.
He knew it was irrational. Knew that the eyes he felt on the back of his neck, the whispers, were as much an illusion as the times he swore he heard his name called from the crowd in the voice of a dead man. Mostly.
He should just go home. He wasn't fit company for anyone, he was done his errands, he should go back to the shop that still didn't yet feel entirely familiar, hide in the back room or the courtyard from everyone, safe behind his mother's skirts and her worried eyes... he walked into the nearest wine shop and put a coin down on the counter.
The gladiator - former gladiator - took the wineskin he received in return, and scanned the room, looking for a quiet corner but at the same time instinctively sizing everyone up and classifying each as a potential threat or not, judging more on mood and level of inebriation than size or build. Hard to tell at a glance who might be the scrappy, squirmy sort of person he hated fighting bare-handed, and he was used to an environment where nobody was entirely harmless. He took a swig of the wine, and reflected that he really should just take his drink and head out. The air inside the tavern was filled with too many voices, and being surrounded by cheerfully drunk people was not going to improve his mood. On the other hand, he didn't really want to go back, either... He scowled and scanned the room again.