The darkening sky seemed to reflect Heron's mood, and he appreciated it for the shade it cast on his sombre walk. He had previously planned to visit while it was dark, but he had swapped shifts with an ill guard. It felt almost like he was betraying Zacharias' trust as he made his way to the graveyard that should have been his final resting place. He clenched his jaw at the thought and his walk became just slightly harsher. He had been so angry, he was still so furious. There was no way to change the situation so he had told himself to funnel his emotion into something positive. There was only so much emotion he could handle before he had broken down. He had almost missed work that day, but that was one way to be separated from the only thing that kept him close to the place that Zach lived- had lived in.
Heron had no one to confide in anymore, his partner was gone. It wasn't as if he could tell anyone about his loss, it was sure to tarnish both their names. He leaned on Zach for so much of his emotional support, it was no wonder he was a wreck. Still, two months later and he felt like he was barely back to standing on his own two feet. He wasn't connected with his family anymore, although he was sure that they'd offer him a roof over his head if he decided to return back to the farm. His mother was one of the only one he was still connected to and her letters indicated that his father had fallen ill. It was just another issue to pile on top of the ones that he already had. He wasn't sure he could emotionally handle seeing his father so weak.
He faltered as he caught sight of the royal graves, slowing to a stop. He spared another glance at the sky, watching as the sun slowly sunk into the horizon. He closed his eyes for a moment, before opening them and continuing on his way. It was only a few more steps before he was at the king's grave. Heron's face was ashen as he knelt down. Although the marker suggested that this was Zacharias' grave, Heron knew that it wasn't. The Creed still held his body hostage, in some kind of sick revenge. No one had the peace to even know that he had crossed the River Styx, because he would be unable to do so. Heron's heart clenched and he had to look away in fear for crying in such a place. Was this some kind of punishment from the gods, for both of them? For not continuing the line of Mikaelidas? For being so selfish as to loving each other? Or was it Zacharias' fate all along? Would he have died if they had run off together as young adults? What if Heron had been with Zacharias the night before his demise, would he have been able to make the prince late and therefore miss the Creed? Stephanos had managed to do that, would it have made a difference if Zach was late too?
Was there really a point of contemplating all these possibilities? Heron knew it couldn't be changed now, that it was the cold reality. And it stung to think this, especially when he couldn't help the repetitious words that swarmed around his head. He couldn't begin to describe how empty yet full of emotions he felt. Heron turned to face the headstone again, pulled out a folded page from his pocket. He smoothed out the creases and cleared his throat. It was a letter he had written to Zacharias within the few days after the announcement of his death. It was words of grief and denial, but he'd like to think that Zach was around to hear the words. Was he a mad man for talking to an empty grave? Perhaps, but he had been told that it would give him some form of solace. Priests were rarely wrong about these things, right?
"Dear Zach." He began, his breath hitching on the man's name. His voice was low and almost inaudible as he spoke again, "The weight of this grief weighs on me heavily so. The idea of you being gone is an impossible one. Only two days ago did we lie side by side, promising to be with one another until we left for Hades." The irony was sour in his mouth, and there was nothing he could do to stop the tears running down his face. "I didn't realise that you'd be leaving so soon, otherwise I would have-" He cut himself off as he heard the approach of another person. The guard had mere moments to collect himself, but he made sure that his actions were not hasty. He would seem suspicious if he made too much of a fuss and as such he took his time to fold the letter to place back in his pocket. The priest had been very wrong about reading the letter out. It had offered no comfort but anger that his lover was not around to read it himself.
Heron stood and turned towards the person who had encroached in his personal grieving times. He stiffened upon finding the gaze of Princess Xene on him and he gave her a short bow. "My apologies for intruding, your highness." The apology felt bitter on his tongue but it was required of him. He knew better than to leave without an acknowledgement of her appearance there as well. Now that she stood in his way, he would need to wait for her dismissal but he didn't offer up a reason for his presence. The less small talk, the quicker he could leave. He wasn't familiar with Xene, but Zacharias had spoken of her with fondness in his voice. Heron had the duty of protecting the premise and the people inside, but he wasn't the friendliest guard on service. Not many of the residents knew him by name, just by his spear and scar.
Tag: Xene of Mikaelidas
Heron had no one to confide in anymore, his partner was gone. It wasn't as if he could tell anyone about his loss, it was sure to tarnish both their names. He leaned on Zach for so much of his emotional support, it was no wonder he was a wreck. Still, two months later and he felt like he was barely back to standing on his own two feet. He wasn't connected with his family anymore, although he was sure that they'd offer him a roof over his head if he decided to return back to the farm. His mother was one of the only one he was still connected to and her letters indicated that his father had fallen ill. It was just another issue to pile on top of the ones that he already had. He wasn't sure he could emotionally handle seeing his father so weak.
He faltered as he caught sight of the royal graves, slowing to a stop. He spared another glance at the sky, watching as the sun slowly sunk into the horizon. He closed his eyes for a moment, before opening them and continuing on his way. It was only a few more steps before he was at the king's grave. Heron's face was ashen as he knelt down. Although the marker suggested that this was Zacharias' grave, Heron knew that it wasn't. The Creed still held his body hostage, in some kind of sick revenge. No one had the peace to even know that he had crossed the River Styx, because he would be unable to do so. Heron's heart clenched and he had to look away in fear for crying in such a place. Was this some kind of punishment from the gods, for both of them? For not continuing the line of Mikaelidas? For being so selfish as to loving each other? Or was it Zacharias' fate all along? Would he have died if they had run off together as young adults? What if Heron had been with Zacharias the night before his demise, would he have been able to make the prince late and therefore miss the Creed? Stephanos had managed to do that, would it have made a difference if Zach was late too?
Was there really a point of contemplating all these possibilities? Heron knew it couldn't be changed now, that it was the cold reality. And it stung to think this, especially when he couldn't help the repetitious words that swarmed around his head. He couldn't begin to describe how empty yet full of emotions he felt. Heron turned to face the headstone again, pulled out a folded page from his pocket. He smoothed out the creases and cleared his throat. It was a letter he had written to Zacharias within the few days after the announcement of his death. It was words of grief and denial, but he'd like to think that Zach was around to hear the words. Was he a mad man for talking to an empty grave? Perhaps, but he had been told that it would give him some form of solace. Priests were rarely wrong about these things, right?
"Dear Zach." He began, his breath hitching on the man's name. His voice was low and almost inaudible as he spoke again, "The weight of this grief weighs on me heavily so. The idea of you being gone is an impossible one. Only two days ago did we lie side by side, promising to be with one another until we left for Hades." The irony was sour in his mouth, and there was nothing he could do to stop the tears running down his face. "I didn't realise that you'd be leaving so soon, otherwise I would have-" He cut himself off as he heard the approach of another person. The guard had mere moments to collect himself, but he made sure that his actions were not hasty. He would seem suspicious if he made too much of a fuss and as such he took his time to fold the letter to place back in his pocket. The priest had been very wrong about reading the letter out. It had offered no comfort but anger that his lover was not around to read it himself.
Heron stood and turned towards the person who had encroached in his personal grieving times. He stiffened upon finding the gaze of Princess Xene on him and he gave her a short bow. "My apologies for intruding, your highness." The apology felt bitter on his tongue but it was required of him. He knew better than to leave without an acknowledgement of her appearance there as well. Now that she stood in his way, he would need to wait for her dismissal but he didn't offer up a reason for his presence. The less small talk, the quicker he could leave. He wasn't familiar with Xene, but Zacharias had spoken of her with fondness in his voice. Heron had the duty of protecting the premise and the people inside, but he wasn't the friendliest guard on service. Not many of the residents knew him by name, just by his spear and scar.
Tag: Xene of Mikaelidas